This summer has been so good to us and there are so many different moments all throughout that I really got to see each kid shine.
Courtesy of Sarah Shrader
Summer, please don’t go! I am not ready for it to be over yet! I am not ready to jump into a new school year and for these babies to go back to another grade higher than last year.
Don’t get me wrong, we will be physically ready – we are finishing up the school shopping this weekend. They will have bookbags and pencils and notebooks – all of their learning materials. It’s not that they won’t be ready – or even that they aren’t ready, it’s just that, I am not sure I am.
You see, going back to school means that each one of my babies is another year older – another year closer to being done with school. Another year of childhood slipped through my fingers. I can’t stop them from getting older and make them stay my babies forever.
Yes, I know how ridiculous that sounds. Of course I cannot stop them from growing. That is the point of life! But, they are my life. And thinking about them all one day closer to really getting out in the world and starting their own lives, well, that makes me sad.
It is such a weird feeling though. Like, I absolutely love watching them grow and learn! This summer has been so good to us and there are so many different moments all throughout that I really got to see each kid shine. I love the growth. I just hate that it is going so fast!
I mean, our oldest hasn’t stopped talking about getting his license – wait, what? Later this year, he gets his temps and he has worked all summer to put money toward a car. I have one kid who poured himself into Math tutoring this summer and grew leaps and bounds and another who started a sport – was defeated at first at the challenge and then overcame it and pushed through.
I watched one of my daughters put her drive and focus into dance and work weeks upon weeks at getting better. Her hard work paid off as she made every competition team she tried out for. Another kid went to soccer camp – first time player — and he came back and repeated word for word the different tactics he learned. Word for word! Surprising from a kid who doesn’t hear my five reminders to pick his dirty clothes up off of the floor. Ha!
One of my girls swallowed all of her fear and showed up with confidence as she tried out (and made) a travel softball team and another one of my girls raved about her dreams coming true as she shone in her cheer uniform during the fair parade.
All of my babies have grown this summer – and this Mama heart has as well. I absolutely love watching these babies transform into their own little beings – figuring out what drives them, what they love, and pushing forward and pursuing those things.
And as we head into another school year, I really do look forward to the getting a front seat at the show of their continual growth. I just hate that it means that they are another year older.
My mom always told me that she cried every year we went back to school – not at our birthdays – but when we went back to school. For a while, I just couldn’t understand that, but I think I finally get it now. It is like all at once, every kid ages. Every kid is another school year older. Every kid is moving that much farther from my arms and that much closer to the real world.
And this world can be cruel and hard sometimes – which scares me as a mom. I want to keep them safe forever. But I know that they are ready for this next year – I have watched each and every single one of them bloom in their own way at their own age and I know that they will continue to flourish as they head into this new school year.
Thankfully, we have a little bit of time yet to soak in what is left of the summer – another adventure or two of spending time together before they step into their next grade at school. I will cherish every second even more on these last few outings – as I watch them closely and take in all of the parts of them at this age and store them in my memory bank to reflect back on.
And when they do step into their new school grade here in a week or so, I know they will be ready. And after a few tears (ok, probably a lot of tears) and tons of prayers, I guess I will be ready too.
Sarah (Pitson) Shrader was born and raised in Lima. She is a Lima Central Catholic and Tiffin University graduate. Sarah is a full-time working mama who enjoys writing about her somewhat crazy, always adventurous life as a mom and bonus mom. She lives in Bath Township with her husband, Lee Parsons, and their seven kids.
